Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize