I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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