so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
