This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
