I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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