Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
