Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
