She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
