Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
