I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
