when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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