Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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