Having a random hookup so left but love u
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
