Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
