where am i from again
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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