So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize