Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
