I think scott just propositioned me for sex
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
