Me too!
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He did a backflip because drugs
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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