I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
