Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
