i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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