i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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