I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
