yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
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