Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
