Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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