And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
