You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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