i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
