Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
