just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
stop calling my apartment porn island.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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