Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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