I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
