Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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