since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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