I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize