4 words: hood of his car
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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