He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize