I must be too annoying 4 u.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
We have so much sex to catch up on
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
