sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
