did you get engaged???
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
