Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
