its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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