You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
