I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
