I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I think weed is turning my hair brown
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
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