I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize