We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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