You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
