I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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